I, like many others, have decided to join the blog world. I actually can't really believe I am doing this and will probably fail at keeping it updated, but I figured I would give it a shot. I want to mainly use this blog to write about my summer and what God is doing through me and others as I raise support to intern with Campus Crusade for Christ in August.
It's going to be a crazy summer and if yesterday is any indicator of what the next few months are going to be like then it's going to be an emotional roller coaster that I'm, honestly, not really looking forward to. I can't wait to get down to Norfolk but there is a lot of work to be done before that can happen.
I woke up yesterday nervous about the day. I knew I would be making a lot of awkward phone calls and I was dreading it. I also knew that I was way behind, with only one appointment set up for the whole week. However, God still blessed my worrying heart with a really sweet quiet time. It is nice to be working for a group that puts your relationship with Jesus above any other thing. The small group that I lead this year decided we would start a Bible reading plan that would go through the Bible chronologically to help us get a full picture of the Bible. I'm not on schedule with the reading plan at all. I failed miserably at keeping up with that. What a great example I am, right?? But yesterday I was so thankful to be behind. Although I was scheduled to read Genesis 22 like a thousand weeks ago, I read it yesterday. It was the story of God telling Abraham to sacrifice his son, Issac. It's a crazy story and one I've heard a million times but it really was what I needed yesterday. Abraham was faithful to what God called him to do and actually took his son up to the mountain to sacrifice him! Abraham was going to sacrifice his son and I can't even be obedient to the little things God asks. The one thing that I really took away from this passage was that Abraham was faithful to what God asked of him and God provided big time. Because Abraham loved and feared the Lord, the Lord provided him with a ram to sacrifice instead of his son. You might be wondering how in the world this relates to my life now as I raise support. God is asking me to push through the hard and awkward times of support raising so that I can see He provides. I have to be faithful to my part in this support raising process and God promises to provide. Shoot, He even promises to provide for me even when I'm not faithful. That's a pretty sweet God we serve!
As I was reading about how Abraham then named the place The Lord Will Provide, I was reminded of the verse in 1 Thessalonians. Chapter 5, verse 25 says "The One who calls you is faithful and He will do it." I don't know how God is going to provide what feels like an insane amount of money but He is faithful and if He has called me to Tidewater, He's going to do it. Thanks Jesus, for that sweet reminder! As I was flipping through to 1 Thessalonians, a verse I had underlined in Galatians caught my eye. Galatians 3:3-5 says "Are you foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort? Have you suffered so much for nothing- if it really was for nothing? Does God give you his Spirit and work miracles among you because you observe the law or because you believe what you heard?" Dang! This hit home big time. After my intern orientation weekend, I was pumped and totally ready to rely on the Spirit to work through me and to get this support raised. It didn't take long before I started leaning on myself and began to really struggle. I was trying to attain my goal by my own human effort. It's so silly that I would ever try to do this on my own. It is 100% impossible without God, but of course leave it to me to try. The last part of the verse in Galatians was also very powerful to me. I really struggle with being a legalistic Christian, so whenever something is going wrong, I immediately figure I must not be having enough quiet times or something. Especially when I think about the challenge I have before me this summer, I tell myself I need to stay on top of my relationship with Jesus or the money wont come in. But no, that thinking is totally wrong. I often times count on God's miracles and blessings because I observe the law instead of just because He is God and I believe in Him. Why do I make my relationship with Jesus so complicated and works based? I'm thankful that Jesus still loves me anyway!
The rest of my day yesterday wasn't quite as encouraging as my quiet time. My time learning about how God provides was followed by an email from my church about how they wont be able to support me. Kinda ironic but God promised to provide so I'm hopeful He will provide in a more outrageous way that I wasn't expecting. I prayed for sweet support stories haha so maybe that's what God is working on right now. I think I will leave my first blog at that. There is plenty more I could write about yesterday but I think this essay is long enough for now. Pray I can keep this updated! :)
